Tour Tweets of the Week: Sagan out, Kittel in, Cav out, EBH in

So much going on, so much controversy this week in the Tour de France: World champion shown the door and a sprint comes down to 6mm … so we’ve got a special Saturday edition of Tour Tweeeeeeets of the Weeeeeeeek. We have Peter Sagan, Mark Cavendish, Marcel Kittel, Andre Greipel, EBH, and soooooo much more

He’s gone, we gotta learn how to face it

We know the basic facts: bunch sprint going nuts, Demare all over the road, Sagan powering on his wheel, Cav trying to get the gap between Sagan and the barricades, Cav goes down and somewhere within all that, Sagan‘s elbow went out.

The aftermatch: it all hits the fan. Sagan gets the boot to the astonishment (and disappointment) of just about everyone, Cav suffers injuries that mean he can’t continue the Tour, much to the astonishment (and disappointment) of just about everyone and Arnaud Demare doesn’t get so much as a cross-eyed look from the jury about his sprint zig-zag line, much to the astonishment (and disappointment) of just about everyone.

Let me just say this now: like the sprint itself, this section is kind of all over the place … just bear with it. 

Possibly the best thing to ever come out of YouTube.

Bora went to the CAS to try to get Sagan’s expulsion overturned, but they threw that out pretty sharpish. And plus, as mentioned below, they don’t have a time machine.

If they do have a time machine, I’d like to think it looks like Dr Peabody’s Wayback Machine. 

After it all, with two of the biggest riders in the peloton out, one thing is certain: both Sagan and Cav conducted themselves with real class.

Andre Greipel had spoken out against Sagan after the stage, in a way that was quite unlike Andre. However, as always, he had the integrity to admit when he was wrong and apologise. This makes me respect him just that much more (and my respect for him was pretty much sky high before this event …). #ClassAct

“he’s a big chap”

 

Every millimetre counts

Another sprinting incident, this time no one crashed out or gone thrown off the Tour, but it was a finish that polarised Twitter. (To be fair, everything polarises Twitter.) It was the closest finish ever in the history of the WORLD (slight exaggeration) and a lot people were very unhappy with the decision. Commence wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Kittel‘s tweet got a lot of nasty replies, which I will paraphrase: How dare you say you won! Where is your humility?! Say it was a dead heat! Say EBH won! Show us the pictures – we don’t believe you won! What are you afraid of – if you drown, it means you’re not a witch!

So: there was only 6mm in it, the Tour has pretty sophisticated equipment and a Twitter picture is just that. As for Marcel’s tweet, he acknowledged how close it was, he paid tribute to EBH, how is this gloating?

There were, however, some very funny tweets about the finish.

When in doubt, I always go to Inner Ring:

 

Who you callin’ fat?

It’s been (mostly) about sprinting this week. Even Froome gets into the conversation with his Freudian slip.

Those mountain stages take their toll on the fast men.

Andre, it’s not just the sprinters who feel the pain on the climbs – love this picture of Romain Bardet after Belles Filles.

It’s the bunch sprint finishes when they have to run the gauntlet of arms attached to iPhones out over the barricades – they’re going like bats out of hell and they must get bruises in the shape of iPhones. Smartphones have definitely screwed up people’s spatial awareness – and ability to pay attention and consider the real world instead of a screen. Use your own eyes, people! Experience the stage, don’t try to record it! And keep your arms inside the barricades!

 

The Gruppetto

Downright joyous! Go, little Citroens, GO!

Dimples are the new black

Doesn’t seem anyone has any faith in Nairo Quintana these days. There will be no attacks. There will be wheel-sucking. There will not be a yellow jersey. 

Fabulous photo gallery

Kind of looks like Koen de Kort and Haimar Zubeldia are having a time out. ‘When one of you admits to spilling that ink over the carpet, you can get off the naughty step’

We’ve been loving the breaks this week.

I have no context for this tweet but I thought it was very funny. The righteous indignation!

Je t’adore

Schleck the Younger doesn’t look ANY different! Except that he looks really happy and relaxed. (His teeshirt pocket says: ‘Hang out. Fall in love’)

The last word

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