Tweets of the Week: “Joey! It’s Marcel!”

It’s January, which starts with J, as does the word joey. No, not Tribbiani – those little kangaroo babies that are so prominent in the run-up to the Tour Down Under. Not only do we have a whole gallery of snake-handling, joey-cuddling, koala-gazing cyclists, but we have Fabs leading the sheep.

Hold me

Nothing says “Hello new season!” like a koala.

TDU A animals startThe ArgoSunGod gets some joey cuddles. If I changed my name to Joey, would he wrap me in a blanket as well?

TDU A Kittel joey 1

TDU A Kittel joey 2 TDU A Cataldo snakes

I’d kind of thought that if you were Australian, you wouldn’t really get excited by joeys because, let’s face it, they’re everywhere (well, at least I think they are. I’ve never been to Australia. I may be talking nonsense). But that didn’t stop Cadel Evans from trying to take a roo-selfie.

TDU A Cadel joeyLars Boom can actually talk to the animals. Or at least reptiles.

TDU A Boom snake

Jack Bauer: the only guy in this selection who looks cool with a koala.

TDU A Bauer koala

Hmm, it looks like Alex Howes slept on wet hair for 60 hours – what an up-do! (BTW, a 60-hour trip? Was he coming from the moon?)

TDU A Alex Howe joeyWhereas Jack Bauer is cool with koala, Marco Coledan – well – he actually makes a 12-foot snake look like an elegant Italian accessory. (I reckon this is how Fabs would wear a snake as well …)

TDU A Marco snake

That koala looks like it’s trying to headbutt the camera. I think it’s had enough.

TDU A Moser koalaWe can’t forget the bestest Australian animal of all – it’s the Crikey Cadel croc. Ah, lovely to see him back.

TDU CrikeyCadel

Hard to believe, but I think Ryder Hesjedal looks even sillier in his new helmet and goggles than he did last year. I do like the black argyle though. Natty.

TDU Garmin Hesjedal

Is it just me or does Heinrich Haussler look like Gordon Ramsay’s younger brother?

TDU Heinrich 2See what I mean? Just me? Really? (I think I should get credit for carrying on the animal theme here. Sheep will figure later on in this column so #StayAlert!)

Gordon Ramsay sheep

“You want a piece of us? Huh? Huh? Do ya????” The Argonauts talk big and bad.

TDU Giant readyAnd with good reason as the ArgoSunGod won Sunday’s People’s Choice Classic.

TDU Marcel winMeanwhile in SanLuis

You know how Victoria Beckham never smiles for the camera because she’s afraid she’ll look daft? (If you didn’t know that, it is true. That is what she thinks.) I wonder if my little #KwiatKrush has taken that advice to heart. He’s not looking his cheerful self.

SanLuis Etixx 2Should we start calling him Rainbow Spice?

SanLuis Etixx 3

Mark Cavendish looks like he’s in a hurry – maybe to get to a press conference? However, behind him, the other Etixxes are auditioning for parts in Rumblefish.

SanLuis Etixx 4

“So, hey, Rainbow Spice, what is that on the front of your bike?” “Handlebars. And you can call me Rainbow.”

SanLuis Etixx 5

Rainbow has become downright animated with that peace sign.

SanLuis Etixx 1Let’s talk about Fabs

When I say, talk about Fabs, I mean look at pictures of Fabs.

Fabs sheep 2 Fabs sheep 1 That is all.

The Gruppetto

Oleg’s hideous punishment if his team doesn’t win everything this season. (I’m really unsure about that facial hair on the Velvet Samurai.)

G Tinkoff training 1 G Tinkoff training 2 G Tinkoff training 3Speaking of the Velvet Samurai …

G Sagan ponyAnd speaking of facial hair …

G Bernie babyPersonally, I think he’s looking a bit Bee Gees with that much facial hair. Go back to the stubble, Bernie! G Bernie beard

As this week’s column was really a menagerie, we’ll end with a pony.

G Rast pony1 G Rast pony2The last word

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