Tweets of the Week: #KwiatKrush, Sagan shrugged & betached chaps

Oh, with the season really shaping up and everyone on the road, it means the twitterstream is full of great tweets. We have a bumper edition this week – we have Strade Bianche in all its dusty glory, the winner looking shiny and new, three loose cannons, a restrained samurai, a saucy striptease and wounds – lots of wounds. (Beware …)

If you knew dusty

One of the things we love about Strade Bianche is the scenery. Is there anything more beautiful than a sunny Italian afternoon with a peloton snaking down the road? Except perhaps a rainy day on the Belgian cobbles? I’ve raided Instagram and Facebook to document the day!

SB landscape 2

SB landscape 1

Reconnaissance by the Tinkoffs. (More on Tinkov further down)

SB reconnaissance

I hate to admit it, but I think Chris Keiser is right – the more I see the Trek kit, the more I think even Spartacus can’t redeem it.

SB Fabs bad kit

Some action shots of the day – and what a day it was. Sagan and Kwiatkowski alone, vying for the top step of the podium.

SB Sagan Kwiat on the road

The ever fanciable Manuel Quinziato rode in support of Cadel. Love them both but I am unsure about those socks. No, I lie. I am sure that they’re kinda hideous.

SB Quinziato

Have to say, Daniele Bennati looks pretty good in Tinkoff yellow.

Bennati

This is a great screenshot from Simon MacMichael. How could she be so relaxed as they rode by? Did she actually realise that there was a major bike race going on?

SB world's calmest fan Of course, Jered Gruber was there and got a shot of the BOOM moment, when Kwiatkowski just rode past Sagan to get a gap and the win.

SB moment he won 2

Fresher than a fresh thing from Fresh Town!

What a fresh-faced little darling that Michal Kwiatkowski is! He looks about, oh, 15. Like Kenny Elissonde‘s older brother. Now I have both a #KennyKrush and a #KwiatKrush!

SB Kwiat interview

Say what you want about Peter Sagan (oh, and we’ll get to that further down the column), he’s a gracious loser. But you can tell it hurt.

SB podium handshake

SB Kwait feeling to win

You wouldn’t think he was old enough to drink, especially with Mick Jagger (more on him further down)! But what a happy face! No winner’s angst here. Just sheer delight.

SB Kwiat toasting

After the wine, a celebratory coffee for everyone the next day. Hang on, where is everyone?

SB Kwiat coffee alone SB Kwiat coffee alone 2

Ah, here they are! You can just see Prince Harry peaking into the picture on the right hand side.

SB Kwiat and team cafe SB Kwiat and team cafe 2

And a look into Kwiatkowski’s future. Personally, I don’t really see the resemblance.

SB Kwiat Kilmer

We love him, we love him not

What side are you on in the Sagan love/hate debate? I was cheering for Kwiatkowski but would have been just as happy if Sagan had won. But there was backlash on Twitter (what else is new?)

SB Sagan love hate SB Sagan love hate 2 SB Sagan love hate 3And it was inevitable – Sagan, podium girl, kissing the winner. But he behaved himself.

SB Sagan do not touch 2SB Sagan do not touch 4

Doctor doctor!

BEWARE: there are some wounds being displayed in this bit. You have been warned!

A certain Bradley Wiggins (we’ll get to him further down) didn’t line up with the others.

SB Wiggins beard

Wiggins would have been given a run for his money by Simon Geschke‘s beard.

SB Geschke beard dust SB Colombia knee SB Colombia knee 2Ewwwwwwwww, I have no idea skin could do that!

SB Kessiakoff wound Am thinking that the picture below might be scarier than the one above. The Lion King handing out bidons! In tight jeans! “Come and get it, big boy!”

SB Cipo jeans
A coupla loose cannons

So remember Oleg Tinkov? And remember the rumour last year (I think it was around summer) that he was going to buy Cannondale after he had his hissy fit with Bjarne and they broke up? And Sagan made it known that if Oleg bought the Cannons, he would leave, walk out the door, “don’t come around now! cos you’re not welcome anymore!” The rumours have started again – this time for a Tinkoff-Cannondale merger next year. Sagan has said that he knows nothing about this development.

Tinkoff Cannons 1 Tinkoff Cannons 1a Tinkoff Cannons 2

Telling that Oleg tweeted this on Saturday. I wonder if in Russian he’s saying ‘With a salary like that, there’s no way I would tolerate him coming second!’ Beware, Peter, of the wolf …

SB Tinkoff Sagan podium

Speaking of loose cannons, Bradley Wiggins was shooting from the hip during an interview with Sport Magazine, published on Friday, the day before he was supposed to ride Strade Bianche (before his beard prevented him).

Picture 6

Wiggins 3 Wiggins 4 Wiggins 4a Wiggins 5

Paul Kimmage springs into action. And the saga continues … Personally, I don’t see this interview happening.

Picture 8

And the third loose cannon in this week’s peloton would be Richie Porte! Due to Chris Froome‘s withdrawal from Tirreno due to back problems (which we hope aren’t serious), Porte was pulled from Paris-Nice, where he was defending champion, to ride Tirreno for Sky. Which is all well and fine – teams can put whoever they want in whatever race they want them in. But Porte – who does seem to have a penchant for blurting before thinking – put ASO’s nose out of joint with his remarks.

Porte ASO 1 Porte ASO 2

Shiny happy people

These are just some lovely pictures of happy cyclists – some betached, some not – and not the usual suspects. Enjoy.

Sky Ben Swift picMarvelous moustaches image

Koen de Kort hair

The Gruppetto

In no particular order.

Roman Kreuziger x 2

kreuziger black and white imageHeads up, Taylor!

Phinney beware

And over the handlebars he goes. He has, however, remained unharmed. (Phew!)

Phinney handlebars thriceThis whole SKYvOGE – I still haven’t a clue as to what it is and it’s already started!

SkyvOGE picPhinney thrice over the barsSo the whole SKYvOGE has something to do with games … or perhaps it’s striptease? Looks like Edvald Boss Hog Nina Haagen-Dazs has been practicing! His cheeks might be chubby but blimey, those are a couple lean legs he has there. The garter is a nice touch.

image

More wounds! Um, and that’s one hell of a codpiece Nacer Bouhanni has there … (I promised myself I wasn’t going to lower the tone this week – but I just can’t help myself).

Bouhanni knee scrape

In an echo from the early 1960s, I say, ‘Mick, get a haircut!’ Mullet flying in the wind – just ain’t right!

Uran mullet

I have no idea what is going on here but is it just me or does Luca Paolini look like a lost Gibb brother in this picture? Luca, how deep is your love?

Paolini Roma

Luca then dons a red nose and relives that precious moment in last year’s Roma Maxima when Pippo thought he’d won and did his salute. He hadn’t won. Neither of them did. (Is it just me or is Paolini looking particularly beefy these days?)

Paolini red nose 1

Paolini red nose 2This is Tom Boonen‘s baby announcement. Congrats all round!

Boonen baby

And Andre Greipel‘s alter-ego is on Australian MasterChef. He may or may not be cooking with bananas.

Greipel MasterChef

Shouldn’t that be ‘fromage’?

Phinney cheese tattoo

The Last Word

Last word Bedlam

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