Tweets: Wiggo on track, Jens abloom and Sagan gumped up

Not unlike last week, it seems that the news was around Jens Voigt and Bradley Wiggins. I’ve thrown in some Sagan, Phinney and Fabs as well, plus, of course, the all important gruppetto. So let’s go!

Dude, what a clambitchin’ bike!

With the announcement that Jens was going to ride one more year – a victory lap around the world, so to speak – Trek went to work on a very custom paint job. I think he tweeted something like eight pictures of his bike, but I thought I’d keep it to four.

Jens bike family Jens bike 1 Jens bike 2 Jens bike wholeHe may be MoFo Jens Voigt, but he still has a sensitive side.

Jens flowers 1 Jens flowers 3 Jens flowers 2

Will he go round in circles?

To paraphrase the great Billy Preston, will Wiggo go round in circles? Seems so. He announced in an interview this week that he was going to do one more year of road racing – but not as a leader or anything, maybe a domestique if the race was right – and then he was going to quit all that to bulk up for the Rio Olympics in the quest for a fifth gold medal. Here was some of the reactions to that bit of news.

Wiggins to quitWiggins good planWiggins goes homeWiggins Andy & BradWiggins Andy & Brad 2So a few mixed reactions there. However, the reaction I had to the hair in this picture was not mixed, it was just sheer horror.

Wiggins WEller HolmDo you remember the film, Labyrinth (or at least the poster for it because no one actually went to it)? With David Bowie as the king of the goblins? Look at Paul Weller in the picture above. Now look below … Same hairdresser. #TrueStory

davidbowie

Posing as Peter Sagan

Just some crazy pictures of the Velvet Samurai. The first one reminds me of that film of the Schleck brothers going fishing in their full cycling kit, including cycling shoes …

Sagan chicken

Can’t wait to see these in action!

Sagan victory salutesI think he’s taking that whole Forrest Gump impersonation too far, don’t you?

Sagan gump bike

Three feet of Phinney

That Boy Phinney was in the Eneco Tour last week and suffered a nasty crash. Like all good bike riders, he tweeted on his way to the hospital, during the hospital visit and afterwards. He was wearing camouflage shoes. And has smoother legs than I can ever achieve. Ah well …

Taylor hospital 1 Taylor knee hospital Taylor shoesAnd now he’s drinking alone in the Detroit of Belgium. I’ll come keep you company, Mr P.

Taylor drinking alone

Some things Fab

>deep sigh< isn’t he dreamy?

Fabs Trek world

This, however, is one of my favourite Fabianese hashtags – right up there with #unclass and ‘shit day of #unluck’ – Fabs doesn’t fly first class. No. He flies #kingClass! (I. Love. Him.)

Fabs king class

The Gruppetto

The Ladies Favourite sorts out his cleats. How perfect is Bernie’s hair???? (Again, smoother legs than mine … I need to sort this out!)

G BernieIvan Basso looking hollow in the Vuelta a Burgos last week. Hollow but still the most elegant rider in the peloton.

G Basso

When George was a pup. I swear to God, I went to high school with a guy who looked exactly like that.

G Hincapie no chin

Now if only I’d gone to high school with a guy who looked like Marcel Kittel and drove a cool car! Pigeon Blanc wouldn’t have been able to contain us! (It looks like Marcel got himself a time machine and that picture was actually taken in 1952.)

G Kittel car G Kittel car 2

Michael Barry has no vanity – posting up geek pics of himself riding to trigonometry class.

G Michael Barry geek

I love this picture. Just love it.

G little girls peloton

This one, on the other hand, scares the hell out of me. Andre Greipel‘s legs look like something HR Giger would construct out of plastic and resin.

G Greipel legs

It’s been a short tweets this week but fear not, we’ll have a bumper column next week for the first of the Vuelta tweets. In the meantime, Shakespeare has been ousted to make room for this very apt quote from The Twilight Zone.

The Last Word

the last word

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