Tweets: Bisons, bubblegum and Tour fever

Strangely, the Twitterstream isn’t as fertile as it usually is. Maybe it’s because there’s no Sky-fighting or Lance is taking a break from his ‘schmoozing the sceptical’ campaign, but there hasn’t been anything too contentious from the past week. Being the consummate professional that I am, though, I have still tracked down a few goodies for you. We have some tweets from the Dauphine and Tour de Suisse, food worthy of a pro peloton, and the start of the ramp-up of excitement to this year’s Tour de France. Let’s begin …

Is that nine bisons in Marco’s jersey?

Race Pinotti bidon collection A

Race Pinotti bidon collectionThe entertainment of the day was only added to by a pesky autocorrect in festinagirl’s tweet of praise for Marco’s feat. Picture 2

Hannah’s Roadside Cafe!

Hannah Grant, one of the hardworking chefs for Team Saxo-Tinkoff, is just about to bring out a cookbook. Me, I love cookbooks. I read them like fiction – do people really whip egg whites to soft peaks, marinate meat in lemon juice and chilis overnight, preheat ovens? But I digress – Hannah treated us to some lovely food shots last week and as this column is posted of a lunchtime, I thought I’d give you a visual feast.

Food cookbook cover Food dish1 Food dish2 Food Saxo pantry(Pssst, be on the lookout – we’re going to be interviewing Hannah in the next few weeks – she might give us some tasty tips …)

If we all chipped in, we’d have enough for five comics and some bubblegum

Ah, cyclists live the life of Riley, don’t they? I mean, they get paid to ride their bikes through the rain, snow and sleet (and that was just the Tour de Suisse this week), they get someone like Hannah to make them their tea, and then they get prize money at the end of the race! So why aren’t more guys crashing their Ferraris, a la Tom and his magnificent Boonens?

Race Dauphine prize moneyAnd here is the prize money list.

Picture 6

With €40,000, the Skyriders could afford a little holiday on Endor.

Race Death Star


So far, the Empire is winning. Will they take France as well in July?

A strange thing is happening over at Inner Ring, however. Anyone who knows cycling – or wants to know about cycling – knows that Inner Ring is the undisputed authority. When arguments over facts or procedures erupt on Twitter, the warring factions sit down at the arbitration table of the Ring. But what I’ve been noticing lately is that he is very, very funny too. Is there no end to his greatness?

Race Froome style Race Jack Bauer

Oh, the trials of time trials. A few guys dread them above all else (anyone named Schleck, usually), most guys just want to get through them with their dignity intact (skinsuits in the rain? ‘Cover your eyes, Ma, it’s obscene!’) but a few are brilliant at them. The two in particular are Tony Martin, reigning TT World Champion, and The Sacred Haunches™, Fabian Cancellara, four-time TT World Champion. They had very opposite experiences this week, however.

Race Martin TTRace Fabs SuisseBefore we leave the races, we need a picture or two. I still can’t get over that at every race, winners – grown men! – get cuddly toys.

Race Meersman Cow

Race Stannard in the mist

Tour Fever

ITV is ramping up the hysteria for the 100th Tour de France and they asked a question along the lines of ‘how do you know you’re obsessed with the Tour?’ (or something to that effect). Here were some of my favourite responses.

Tour fever Tour fever 2 Tour fever 3 Tour tennis shoes

The Gruppetto

A picture of the lovely Alex Dowsett always has a place in this column. (Nice to know that even if you leave Sky, you can still be lovely.) G Alex Dowsett

There have been a couple of opposites in the column so far, but none quite as opposite as this pair of tweets about the upcoming UCI Presidential Election. G Cookson : Vino president

A picture of a 12-year-old Greg Henderson will always have a place in this column.

G Early Henderson G early Henderson 2

As will a picture of that great cycling legend, Edie Mercx (sic)
G Edie Mercx

Ah, That Boy Phinney does like his designer gear. Being fully conversant in both American and British English, I had to laugh thinking about Taylor’s tailored Dior underwear.

G Phinney Dior pants G Phinney Dior pants 2

Remember this guy? He used to arrive at the finish line out of nowhere to take some pretty legendary sprints! Well, he’s cross now.

G Robbie trophy

I’m still not sure if this really is Bradley Wiggins. I thought he was a Mod, but he looks like he’s channelling some sort of New Romantic/80s vibe here. I see he still has some gels stuck up his trouser leg. Well, I’m hoping those are gels. Or maybe it’s just badly tailored Dior underpants.

Picture 5

The Last Word

Not a bad way to live your life …

Last word Gaimon

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